Seeking an Ideal Mentor

Dear PC:

You are so amazing to me for many reasons, the least of which is your 64-bit operating system, 4.00 GB installed memory and other cool stuff. Please don’t think less of me because I am not a computer geek, techie or anyone remotely familiar with how computers work, other than the typing part. I’ve only known you for one year, yet I never cease to be astonished by your anthropomorphic qualities. Which is why I am writing this note to ask you to be my mentor.


Before you discount me for being technologically inept, please let me tell you why you would be an ideal mentor for me. At the top of the list, I love how you let the world know when you’ve had enough. You emit a very gentle tone to inform me that your battery is low and that I’d better charge you, or…well, you know what happens when you’re not charged. I wish I’d learned years ago when enough is enough. I just kept charging ahead until I collapsed.

Another of your qualities that I admire is how you tend to do what you want when you want. Sometimes you omit words or sentences simply because you feel like it, and not according to anything I might have typed or done. Your little cursor thing skips all over the screen, because I think you get moody. I admire your willingness and ability to act on your moods, and not worry about what other people (me) think.

You seem to be relentless when you have your mind on something. I can only imagine that it’s your mind at work, because I have heard there is intelligence there. There are times when, for no reason that I can see, you refuse to shut down. No matter what I do, how many buttons I push, or bloodcurdling screams I emit, you just don’t respond to my desire for you to be off. Then, and perhaps I should apologize for this, I resort to taking out your battery just so you’ll stop. But, I am in awe of the way you forge ahead and keep on going regardless of what I want from you.

Have you ever even given a thought to how your actions affect me? No, probably not. Well, that’s ok, it’s not really that important. Sometimes your movements inconvenience me, but you are definitely your own girl. So I guess you could say that the inconveniences are my problem, not yours.

You seem to care about me, too. One time, I forgot to back up my files. I know, dumb move. Of course, there was a power outage that night, and I lost a book manuscript that I’d been writing for 8 hours. Oh, yes, PC, you showed me tough love that day, didn’t you? It was a hard lesson for me to learn, and I appreciate you teaching me. It probably hurt you as much as it did me, didn’t it?

You have so many other charms that captivate me, but I hope this gives you a glimpse into why I’d like you to mentor me. I look forward to hearing back from you. Truly, PC, you can change my life and the lives of so many women by your unrelenting insistence not to take crap from the rest of the world.

Maybe technology won’t be the death of us, after all.

Always and hopefully yours,

Geezer Goddess


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